I think that's the end of "raw." Three and a half years of blogging -- three and a half of the worst years of my life, and things are looking to get worse when I have no job, no money, and no place to live, in about 28 days from now.
I'd like to close the blog with a (repeat?) quote from my favorite of favorites, Francis Bacon -- founder of modern science, the real Shakespeare, mastermind behind the colonization of the Americas, and, just as likely as not, still living. I am paraphrasing him:
"A little learning inclineth the mind to atheism, but, greatness of learning bringeth the mind back to God."
The years 2000-2010 were all about "greatness of learning" for me, just as the '90s were about crap knowledge given to the masses. You could say I discovered God in about 2008 or so, when I got seriously into Theosophy. I owe so much, in this incarnation, to Manly P. Hall and Helena P. Blavatsky -- words can simply not express. And, perhaps the above quote can sum up the lesson I learned in this incarnation -- and that I'll take with me to the grave.
In mid-2005 or so, I started using "The Secret", i.e., using positive affirmations to change my life, accomplish my goals, etc. When I applied "The Secret" to trying to discover what I really want to accomplish, I came up with several goals that covered the gamut of knowledge, and gleaned from the Library of Congress classification system. That systems divides all knowledge into 22 categories, so I set a goal to become "the greatest" in each of these, e.g., "I have become the greatest philosopher ...", "I have become the greatest psychologist ..." etc., for all 22 knowledge areas.
After a year, that process lead to my discovery of 9/11 being an inside job, then about the fraudulent banking/financial system, legal system, education system, then about suppressed technology and secret societies, chemtrails, false religions, and on and on. All of this very much mimicked the way that Truman discovered his world to be false. Now, even though I'm on the verge of total impecuniousness I am disenchanted with the world and often wish to be free from humanity forever -- there is nothing about living in "the system" that attracts me.
The world is almost entirely psychopathic, not because it needs to be so, but because it's artificially maintained in that way. I watched G. Edward Griffin interview congressman Norman Dodd a few years back, and Dodd mentioned that a woman he worked with eventually lost her mind as a result of reading the minutes from the meetings of certain tax-exempt foundations in the States during the early to mid-1900s. The point is that we have the most anti-social people actually running society -- and it has been that way for thousands of years! It's not only depressing, it can truly test the sanity of any human -- naturally social -- being. The situation is like playing on a team (say the human species?) and finding out that members on your own team are conspiring against you (and all the while saying, "Oh nooooo! We're not conspiring against you.").
One of my great desires over the past few years has been to discover why the "conspiracies" exist -- why must things be the way they are? I have concluded that the social axiom, "nothing is as it seems to be" applies at the individual level as well, "I am not what I appear to be." I am not a human being, and I am not mortal. There would be no need for such deception at the social level if as I were as I appear to be.
Come to think of it, maybe it's not the end of raw. I'm having plenty of trouble at the temp. job I'm at right now because of the heavy lifting -- my right knee and back are turning into Swiss cheese. I don't want to give up the income, but I can still walk relatively well and normally -- I'd like to keep it that way. I'm feeling totally alienated from all humans, which I see as monsters and beasts at the etheric level (well, I and most of the occultists throughout history), so I'm very interested in "disappearing", getting away from humans for as long as it takes to become pure etherically, and consequently illuminated. I don't know if I'm going back to work next week or not.
2 comments:
I love you Tony.
And you are a great writer.
I hope you get "into the wild".
Love, MOM
I would like to add to your blog the following link:
http://www.box.net/shared/static/unkgqozxzl.mp3
You have to register to get in - then click on Lucia Rene to hear the interview. Skip the intro - just listen to Lucia - especially about dealing with fear.
Here is a bit of information:
Lucia René
Unplugging the Patriarchy
CLICK to Listen
For centuries, Patriarchy has defined and reinforced women's experience of separation: separation from one other, from men, from the larger socio-political world, and most importantly from their own deeper selves. From the 19th century onward, this dominant Patriarchal paradigm has continued to break down, and so have the ascribed gender roles that previously held it together, opening women to unprecedented possibilities for personal, collective and spiritual growth. Yet, it seems that we women are still struggling to shake off centuries of patriarchal conditioning that has taught us not to step out or speak up in a way that really matters.
Join us for an intimate dialogue with writer, teacher and mystic, Lucia René, as she shares wisdom and insights from her new book, Unplugging the Patriarchy. According to Lucia, the only way we as a species are going to generate the solutions necessary to deal with the political, economic and environmental crisis now facing us, is if women today take on the deep and sacred task of unplugging from the Patriarchy, both within and without. Lucia René is a writer, teacher and ordained Buddhist monk, who for forty years has drawn on the practices of Hinduism, Zen, Advaita and Vadriyana Buddhism. Her spiritual work culminated in a seventeen year apprenticeship to an enlightened master who taught American Buddhism, psychic development, and tantric mysticism.
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